The Phat News of Mark

The Hippie Bible

By 2 Hawks
Copyright 2001
All Rights Reserved

Chapter 16

1. Now when the Sabbath was past, Mary Magdalene, Mary the mother of Jimmy, and Salome brought spices, that they might come and anoint Him.
2. Very early in the morning, on the first day of the week (Sunday), they came to the tomb at sunrise.
3. And they said among themselves, "Who will roll away the stone from the door of the tomb for us?"
4. But when they looked up, they saw that the stone had been rolled away-for it was very large.
5. And entering the tomb, they saw a young man clothed in a long white robe sitting on the right side; and they were alarmed.
6. But he said to them, "Do not be afraid. You seek Jesus the Branch, who was crucified. He has risen from the dead! He is not here. See the place where they laid Him.
7. "But go and tell His disciples and Rocky. He is headed for Galilee; there you will see Him, as He said to you (1)."
8. And they went out quickly and fled from the tomb, for they trembled and were amazed. And they said nothing to anyone, for they were afraid.
9. Now when He rose early on the first day of the week (Sunday), He appeared first to Mary Magdalene, out of whom He had cast seven demons.
10. She went and told those who had been with Him, as they mourned and wept.
11. And when they heard that He was alive and had been seen by her, they did not believe.
12. After that, He appeared in another form to two of them as they walked and went into the country.
13. And they went and told it to the rest, but they did not believe those who had seen Him after He had risen.
14. Afterward He appeared to the eleven as they sat at the table; and He schwagged their unbelief and hardness of heart, because they did not believe those who had seen Him after He had risen.
15. And He said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the phat news to every creature (2).
16. "He who believes and is baptized will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned.
17. "And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues;
18. "they will take up vipers
(3); and if they drink any poison, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands of the sick, and they will recover."
19. So then, after the Lord had spoken to them, He was received up into heaven, and sat down at the right hand of God.
20. And they went out and preached everywhere, the Lord working with them and confirming the word through the accompanying signs. Amen (4).

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Love God with your whole being!

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Footnotes & Commentary

1. The angel reminded them that Jesus had prophesied many times that He would rise from the grave and go to Galilee. See Mark 14:28; Mark 10:34; Isaiah 53:5, 10; Zechariah 13:7; Matthew 26:31; Mark 14:50.
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2. Preach to all creatures. St Francis Assissi preached to the birds in the field. Does this mean all dogs do go to heaven?

3. Vipers: Pit snakes or poisonous snakes. It may also refer to false teaching and false teachers. Vipers are born live and eat their parent.
4. Verses 9 through 20 were not found in the Codex Sinaiticus and Codex Vaticanus,. They were in all of the copies of Mark.

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